I hear the secrets that you keep....!!!

    What truths or personal struggles could we possibly reveal in our sleep that we would otherwise conceal when we are awake?  This is why I am scared to fall asleep in the hammock on my patio or by the pool within earshot of everyone in my apartment complex:

Stupid me....

    I made a fuss at everyone in the library today because I couldn't find a book where I thought it was supposed to be.  Someone went and looked for me...and it was one shelf above where I was looking, in the correct place.  After all my fussing, I feel so stupid!  If Gene Wilder was a librarian, I imagine this is what he would say to me:

 

  

Hysterical!

            Gift-giving is hard for me.  I never know if a gift I give to somebody is good enough for them or if they will like it.  Will I offend them if they don't like it?  Will they be upset with me if it seems much cheaper than a more expensive, nicer gift I gave somebody in the past?  Hearing the tears at wrapping paper makes me a little hysterical.  Gene, in The Producers (1968), acts out what feels like my internal struggle with this issue.

                 What are some things that make you hysterical?  Not what makes your blood boil or a pet peeve.  Think of something that makes you very uneasy whereas it might not for others.  

Gene the husband

            The ideal husband.  I would give anything to be married to Gene!!   He's excited, a good horseman, and resolves marital disputes well.  Not to mention the rawhide and honey....mmm.  Oh Gene, will you marry me?

Scathing Gene

    I always thought that Willy Wonka maintained a healthy balance of sexy and brutal.  One minute he is poised and well composed, then the next he is having your children sucked up tubes, rolled out of the factory or he is screaming at you.  He is terrifying if you think about it, but still sexy.  He's got great style.  And a chocolate factory to have awesome parties at.  I bet he chills with all sorts of sexy women in the chocolate pool.  And when he tires of them, he just has them sucked up and away. 
   
     He should write the book on pimpin'.

   

        Pimps, take note.  You can learn a lot from a screaming Gene Wilder.  I suggest you can use this sort of tone with some of your more defiant and mouthy ladies.  http://www.facebook.com/pages/You-know-Willy-Wonka-was-a-pimp/102303523140723

A blog dedicated to the screaming Gene Wilder

      I dedicate this blog to Gene Wilder's screaming.  There's something about Wilder's screaming that is so threatening, dominating, disciplining, yet beautiful and fulfilling like warm rays of sunshine cast upon your body after waking up in the middle of a dewy flower field where just the night before you were gazing up at the heavens and counting all the shooting stars.  Oh fuck it.  Sometimes we want to be punished and abused, and Gene is always the man to do it to ya.  Please treat yourself to at least one screaming Gene Wilder clip per day as to maintain optimum mental anguish.

      I have chosen the following clip, as I find it appropriate for the opening post of this new blog: